A married woman or Engaged? Newlywed? or have been married 47 years? Still, there are some similar points that married or engaged women should never do. Both husband and wife should take responsibility for in a marriage. It should be remembered that the main goal of marriage is peace and happiness. If life is stressful, then work on changing your way of looking to it. You will see peace instead of stress then. Just be happy. The simplest route to something is to be happy and positive. The only person you can change is you, yourself. So, here i come with the points you should remember and never do if you are married.
1. Giving upFights take place between every other husband-wife, but what’s important is to hold on to the relationship. There can be arguments on different topics, your point of view may not match all the time, so it’s upon you to handle such situations. Remember giving up is never a solution to the problem, it’s just to end it all. So, this should never be in your list.
2. No respectTwo persons when bind in a strong bond, have many dreams in their eyes. A dream of spending a happy life with the partner, of being respected, trusted and loved. Respect, care and loyalty are definitely the key points required to be remembered for a happy marriage. So, respect him the way you want to be respected.
3. CompareDon’t go into the game of comparing him with anyone else’s husband. Never! He is yours, and you should be proud of him. His flaws should be happily accepted by you. Try to understand his perception instead of comparing him with someone else’s husband. Every individual is perfect in one or other way. Might be yours one is Mr. Perfect in his way.
4. Using words to hurt, maim and destroy your marriageMen are stronger physically. But when it comes to verbal fights women have the advantage. Women very well know how to use words for the most effectiveness. Some women are perfect at using the sharpest words in order to shame,and belittle their man. Words are like arrows. Once they are out, there is no getting them back in. Regardless of how sorry you are afterward, the damage is irreparable.
5. Stop having unrealistic expectationsSeeking all your wishes from one person, and pointing your unhappiness onto him when he doesn’t keep up to his expectations will quickly destroy your marriage. If you feel unhappy, first examine reality. You will be happier if you make those expectations that can be reality. Make yourself happy.If you expect your husband to complete you and make yourself happy, not only are you leading him to failure, but you are also disappointment yourself.
6. Use of sarcastic statementsThis shows your husband that you don’t respect him or his opinion. When you are sarcastic with your husband, he feels un-valued. Listen to him, without always adding your two. If you like to ask questions, wait till he stops. Don’t interrupt. Let him be the center of your attention. Let him feel that you would like to hear about the rest of his day.
7. sarcastic facial expressionsAnother way of showing disrespect is to make sarcastic facial expressions. These are just as irritating for your husband. These will show that you have no respect for him. He feels worthless and even disrespected.
8. Don’t Criticize himWhen you criticise your husband, you diminish your husband in your eyes. Your friends and family don’t live at your house and they don’t see what goes on all whole day. They don’t see the good things of your husband and only view the one that you present to them. If you belittling him, then they will view him as a bad partner for you.When you speak poorly of your partner, your close friends and relatives will remain against your husband. He will never understand why your friends and family don’t like him.
9. Making fun of him in front of friends and familyMaking fun of your partner in front of others is totally wrong. You are belittling him in front of others. This may make him feel that you don’t care about his feelings. When you speak of your husband, use encouraging words. If he is acting like a jerk, you don’t need to tell about it to everyone.
10. Withhold affection and sexThis can cause a huge rift in your marriage. Your husband needs physical affection through sexual intimacy. It is not just something he is demanding of you. It can be said as something he needs, physiologically speaking. When you refuse to meet his need for physical release, you drift a wall between the two of you. This is not about, you like or dislike sex. It is much more important than that as your needs to connect with you on a physical level.
11. Disrespecting his insight, opinions and adviceMen and women are different on many levels and men are usually fixers by nature. If you present a problem, he will come up with steps to solve the problem. When you don’t agree, it sends the message that you do not value him and his advice . When you come to your husband with a problem, be ready for him to create an action plan. He does so to resolve your conflict. It may not be exactly what you would do. All you should know is that he is offering a solution. The least you can do is listen to his suggestion. Remember, be thankful to him for his input.
12. Not giving him his authority, but demanding full responsibilityIn any organisation, there must be a leader. The person who carries the responsibility is the one who has the final say. Families and relationships are much like any organisation. There must be someone in charge. Someone should be there who will take full responsibility. He would do his best when things go wrong. You, of course, are welcome to take that role. It is easy to be critical of the person in charge. It is too easy to think that you could do a better job. But the hard part comes when it is time to take responsibility. Try instead to work together. You can decide together how things should be done. Try to offer him to make the final decisions.
13. Don’t be unhappy at all timesWhen you spend all your time acting unhappy, it gives a negative impression to your partner . The goal of marriage should happiness. You have an obligation to be happy. If the goal is to be happily married, then it is up to you to exercise self control, and try to make your moments happier ones. Only you can make yourself happy, no one else can do it for you, unless you don’t want to be. If you believe that your happiness comes from other people or circumstances, you will never be happy. It is in-fact a decision. You can choose to be a miserable, unhappy or you can pull your boots on and show up in your marriage as the person you’d like to be.
14. Demoralizing him and crushing his spiritMost of the men believe their wives to be more moral than themselves. The wife agrees, often. She does not see herself as wrong. Wives typically admit to bad behavior, but attribute it to hormones and chemical imbalances. If you are among those who feels perfectly justified in attacking every flaw, and pointing out every failure, you are not your husbands Holy Spirit. Change yourself and stop trying to correct every little flaw of his. Everyone makes mistakes. You can build him up or break him down. The choice is totally yours .
15. Don’t let your past effect your presentEvery one of us has a past and we cannot decline the fact. The Past is an inseparable part of life but what you have to do is forget it if you are now with someone else. Your responsibility, your love, your care, your loyalty, everything is his. He is your present and your past should never be allowed to affect it. He should be totally sure that you are his and there should be no sense of insecurity on his part. So, if you want a happily ever after marriage it is time to bring little changes and make your husband feel proud to be with you. Let, the love spread in the air.
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